Just Life...and a little more

one more time...

2009-10-04T19:52:00.000-07:00

So it's been awhile since I updated and I wanted to give you a heads up on what's been going on in life. Finished up my summer classes at the end of July, and then gladly took the month of August off from school. Took a much needed vacation with the family, and then started my last fall semester of college. It really didn't feel much different than all the rest but with 18 hours staring you in the face, with a possible 20 in the spring, I guess that will come in time. School's not too bad right now, but it will get tough and I'm preparing for it. All in all I know that no matter what's thrown at me, God's taken care of it and whatever happens, it's because he's got it all under control.

I read a blog called Stuff Christians Like, written by John Acuff. In one of his posts, he talked about how he has struggled with consistently reading his bible and at the end he challenged his readers to take a journey with him through the book of Proverbs during the month of September. We would read a chapter a day, then send a tweet about it to keep each other accountable. I really enjoyed the journey and I really believe God taught me some really cool things. Here's some verses I learned from:

"One's pride will bring him low, but he who is lowly in spirit will obtain honor." Pr. 29:23
“Don’t wear yourself out to get rich” Pr. 23:4
"He who loves purity of heart, and whose speech is gracious, will have the king as his friend" Pro. 22:11
"A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion" Pr. 18:2
"A friend loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity" Pr. 17:17
"whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm" Pr. 13:20
"whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, but a man of understanding remains silent" Pr. 11:12
"My fruit is better than gold, even fine gold, and my yield than choice silver" P8:19

Just a quick review of my time in Proverbs this month, but some really good stuff.

Storming the Gates of Hell

2009-07-29T20:28:00.000-07:00

Ever seen the movie UP? If not, it is a story about an old man who has lost his wife, and his pursuit to fulfill her one desire while on earth. There is a lot of in between, but without ruining the movie for you, that is one of the basic plots. This old man does everything possible to get his wife's desire accomplished, even using balloons to float a house and then pulling it with a water hose. After I saw this movie, I could not stop thinking about my pursuits and what I would do to see them completed. It caused me to think about the things that I do that really don't serve a purpose, or are even a hindrance to the cause that I am working towards. I'm not very good at pulling my house with a water hose so that I can reach the spot I want it to land. I lose track of where I am going. I get tired, worn out, disheartened, and just plain lazy. But I serve a God who still loves me even when I feel like giving up. That loves me with a love that my human brain cannot come close to understanding. This same God has called me to obedience to him. Called me to love him. Called me to love people. Called me to live a life that points to him. Called me to do whatever it takes so that people hear his message. Called me to storm the gates of hell.

That being said I have been giving the amazing invitation to join a team of people that has set out to do just that. To become beggars that tell other beggars where to find food and do whatever it takes to help them find it. So after many months of praying, talking, pondering, waiting, thinking, and letting God shape me, I have this to say:

To Mr. Nic Burleson and other members of the Launch Team at your future church plant,
I, along with Kaylen, would like to accept your invitation to join the team. We are whole-heartedly committed to doing whatever it takes to reach lost people. We believe that God has great plans for this group. We believe that the Kingdom will look different because of the obedience of this group to the calling he has placed on our lives, and because of the saving power of his grace that he has bestowed upon us. I am beyond words excited for what is to come. I cannot wait to get started serving with such an awesome group of people who have a true desire to reach lost people.

Father,
I thank you for being who you are and for loving us enough to send your son to die for our mistakes. I thank you for creating each and everyone of us specifically to fit your plan, so that when it all comes together, we can say nothing but that you showed up and did your thing. I pray for the members of this team. Strengthen, encourage, build up, shape and mold us to what you want us to be. Get rid of the things hindering us from being lights in a dark world. Prepare us for what you have to come. Give us hearts for the poor, hurting and lost people. Be with us father.
Amen

Impact Weekend Review

2009-04-08T20:01:00.000-07:00

Here is a quick review of Impact weekend at The Connection Church.

Got to hang out with some of the coolest high school guys around. No, seriously, I've hung out with a lot of students and these guys had it going on. We had some great conversations and I know that God has a huge plan for each one of them.
Friday night we played/supervised/stood around during one of the most unorganized games of capture the flag ever, but the students had a blast, and my group helped win, so it all worked out.
Taught 3 sessions on Love. I'm probably the worst DNOW leader, but God moved and the guys heard what HE wanted to teach them.
Saturday afternoon learned my way around Kyle, TX as we took part in a scavenger hunt. I think we got screwed, but we did our fair share of cheating, so no hard feelings.
Saturday Night Nic Burleson BROUGHT it as he shared with the students in an old train car downtown.
Sunday morning we got to see people being baptized outside of the PAC in a portable baptistery. After the second service, one of my students got baptized, which was awesome!!
The people serving students at TCC are UNBELIEVABLE!!!! These people have a true understanding of what it means to love God and people. They pour everything they have into those students!!
I was blessed to stay with the Barnes family. They have an amazing house, and incredible faith to open it up to a bunch of high school guys for the weekend!

I had a great time helping out. I couldn't be more blessed to be able to serve with such an awesome team for the weekend, but more importantly almost forty students found out just how much God loves them.

Father,

I want to thank you for the opportunity to serve this past weekend. I know that you moved among your people and that lives were changed. I pray that the things that you taught these students and the commitments that they made will stick. Help them to see that you don't just love them because they have done something, but that you love them unconditionally and that love is poured out freely. I pray that you would help them to share that passion that they have for you with their friends. I want to thank you for the people that you have placed in Kyle that are working with these students. It was amazing to see the work being done. These guys really have a heart for you and care about the students they are working with. I pray that you would continue to use them, and not let them get down because of hard times that come their way. God I thank you for what you are doing through The Connection Church. People are finding Christ and seeing your love for them. I pray that you would continue to move among your people.

Community

2009-04-07T20:07:00.000-07:00

So I'm taking a class this semester where we are studying mission theology. I've never really been a big fan of the word theology, just because well to be honest it scares me. I know I have some theology, and that really it's just thoughts on God, but for me it's a lot bigger and different than that. Anyways, that's not the point of this blog. In this class for most of the semester, I sit in the room and pray that I can mentally stay in the classroom for an hour and a half. It's hard because half of the time I have NO idea what we are talking about. It's been a real struggle for me and I know that my grades show it. I have had no motivation for the class, and on most days dreaded going. Then on Monday I got to experience one of the coolest things I have been apart of since my HPU experience began. We started off the class with some lecture and then she handed out an exam. When everybody was done we went upstairs and got into groups. She then had us discuss with each other our answers and come up with a group version of what we thought the answers were. We then had to take the grade that the group came up with. Afterwards, we took the Lord's supper, with a sort of spin on it. We all got to pick from a list of different types of problems that we would have in our lives. Then we encouraged each other to rely on God to help us through these problems, and then invited each other to take the lord's supper. After we had taken the bread, we shared stuff that was going on in our real lives, and got encouragement from the group, before taking the wine (grape juice).

This concept blew my mind. Every time I have ever been apart of a Lord's supper service, we have always been asked to examine ourselves before we took part in it, but this was a totally different concept. Instead of just examining ourselves, we were able to get real with the people around us, and then receive encouragement for the situation. I think in our churches today we almost totally throw out community. We are more concerned with what we do as an individual, and not what is happening in the lives of our brothers and sisters. I think when we are asked to examine ourselves and share with the others around us, we are forced to deal with the issue, and then also we see that those around us truly care for us and want to encourage us in our struggle. It felt like as we took the Lord's supper, I was more free of the struggle than before because my community around me was helping my lay it before Christ.

Father,
I pray that we would not forget about those around us. I believe that you have placed these people in our lives for a reason, and so many times we forget about that. God, help us to take the focus off ourselves, and remember the needs of the people around us. I pray that you would open the eyes of the church and allow us to see the impact that the community of believers can/should/will have. Allow us to move from seeing ourselves as individuals but as one body whose purpose is to glorify you.

Misson Arlington/Misson Metroplex Weekend Conference

2009-02-25T19:04:00.000-08:00

nSo this past weekend, I attended the 1st Mission Arlington/Mission Metroplex Local Leadership Conference. It was an incredible weekend and this blog won't even do justice to the things that went on, but I'll try to paint as best a picture as I can.

Here is the schedule of events, just to give you an idea of what we did during the weekend:

Friday
We all met for supper, which was some Mexican food cooked by two of the missionaries, and had an introduction time. We then took a tour of the whole complex. I probably could have led the tour for the most part, but we did get to go into the dental and medical clinics which I had never seen.

Saturday
We met and had some breakfast, then headed off to do some work projects. (I chuckled to myself at all the preacher types who showed up in slacks and button up shirts.) Our group got to sort through a mountain of toys that have been donated to the mission for their annual Christmas store. This year the gave away a ton of toys and they literally start gearing up for the next year the day after Christmas. After lunch we split up into teams and went with a few of the missionaries to their complexes, where they showed us around and let us do some work for them. They answered questions on what their life was like and how they did ministry in the apartments that they served in. We then headed back to the mission for our breakout session. This, for me, was the best part of the weekend. Some of the staff members offered up their advice and thoughts on different subjects, and then answered questions from the group. I'll go more in to detail later, but this was a really cool time where the missionaries got to share their hearts.

Sunday
This was probably the best day overall. As a youth going to Mission A, we always had to be back home and couldn't stay for the Sunday services. On this trip we were privileged to be invited to attend church at some of the local apartments. My group went with an elderly couple to a bible study that was comprised on almost all Hispanics. We sang songs in Spanish and English, heard a bible story and then broke up into groups for further study. I went with the group of school age kids as the took part in an acting out a meal with the 12 disciples. It was really cool to see these kids sit around a table and read cards about the disciples as they shared a meal together. They really paid attention to each other and seemed to really want to learn more about each person.

Next I want to give you some highlights that I took from the breakout sessions that I attended:

Transformed, Not Transplanted: Building a church out of lost people, not church shoppers. Dr. Jim Burgin

We are all missionaries, we just get to sleep in our own bed at night
3000 people living in the same area form their own culture and we must recognize that
We have reversed the Great Commission...COME IN HERE!!!
We have made it about the Church, not about the KINGDOM!!
You will have failure in your life, church, ministries
Prayer is HUGE...it keeps you connected, and it takes HARD work
We have to have a love for people...God loves them
We have to have a willingness to take a risk, or two, or three
This might mean leaving our 11am Sunday service
We have to be consistent
We have to build up a strong team, and be accountable and together!!
Building up trust take time and patience
Trust the Gospel to develop, and God to save
We can't make mission just an outreach of the church, but what the church itself is
We limit the harvest because of our preconceived ideas of teachers

I Started a Bible Study.....Now What? How to take the second step. Matt Hart

You CANNOT plan a move of God
People will know they are a project if you make them one
Jesus meets people where they are
The Great Commission is not multiple choice
Do people around you say: "It looks different because the Christians have been here!"?
You have to prove to people that you love them as a person not as a statistic
Are we: Acts 2:42-47
Devoted to teaching and prayer: Involving the Gospel in everything we do
Together with everything in common: Just be with the people. Eat, play, live with the people
Giving to anyone who has need: Find and meet needs: physical, spiritual, emotional, educational, etc.
Praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people: Make sure that God always gets the glory for everything that happens
More complicated and more expensive is not more effective than simple gifts of time

This was an amazing weekend. Friday and Saturday night I got about 4 or 5 hours of sleep because I was too excited about what God was going to do with the things people took from this conference. I think that the weekend could be summed up in the words of a black pastor from Mississippi that I had a conversation with Sunday before we left. He had just got back from one of the apartment churches and he said this: "I never understood why people didn't want to come to my church, but this morning I saw God move in the lives of people who would never step foot in our church building. God showed up this morning and we had church, right there in a run down apartment, it was AMAZING!!!!"

From Xmas to now...and beyond!!

2009-01-06T19:52:00.000-08:00

Well it's been awhile and I wanted to catch you up on what's been going on here lately.

Finished up my first semester at HPU. Not too bad grade wise, really ready to be done and move on, but it's been an interesting experience so far and I'm being stretched in ways I would have never imagined.
I've spent a lot of time at work since school's been out, which is good for in the money category, but isn't always my first choice in things to be doing.
Spent a day or two with the family. I absolutely love my family and every minute I get to spend with them is awesome.
Kaylen got two weeks off from work and has spent most of it down here. Although we didn't spend as much time as we would have like together, we did get to spend a ton more than usual which was really a blessing.
Also got to spend some time with some friends that I haven't seen in a while. It made me realize how much I MISS doing life with them. I can't wait until our lives cross paths more frequently.
One of the big things that happened the break is that I move from the Wood back home with my parents. It's been a pretty big change so far and defiantly a little different.
Although not having to pay rent or bills is going to be freaking sweet for a little while, my real reason for moving back is that this summer I am hoping to have an internship somewhere. I really want to get out and get involved in something that is going to help me down the road when I get finished with school. I've applied at a few places but who knows where I will end up. Be praying that God would be moving in this decision and help me to gain what he wants me to from whatever I end up doing this summer.

That's really all I've got right now. Got to get some sleep because of a few more days of work before another semester of school starts.

Love and Life

2008-12-12T09:44:00.000-08:00

So I'm writing this blog with the hopes that I get it finished in time to post it by midnight, because you see, December 15 is a big day of the year. Kaylen and I have been dating for 4 years now and I have to say that it has been amazing. What is even more amazing is that God has allowed me to be in this relationship. I can honestly say that she is my best friend. From times when I am a total jerk to the few times I get it right, she is always there for me. She keeps me grounded when I want to fly off the handle or forget what I'm about. She pours out her love no matter what I do. There are no words to describe what she means to me. I thank God daily for blessing me with her. I literally can't wait to spend the rest of my life with her and to see what God has in store for us.

God,
I just want to thank you for creating Kaylen, for knitting her together the way you did. She is an amazing, beautiful woman. I thank you also for blessing me and allowing me to share in life with her. I would not be the person that I am now, if not for what she brings to me. I pray that you would be with us and help us to not only grow closer together, but also grow together to you. Amen

Seeing God in the Coolest Places

2008-10-30T19:39:00.000-07:00

So i've been meaning to blog on this for a few weeks now, but i've been crazy busy and well just didn't get around to it. A few weekends ago, I rode with my family to Dallas to visit my great grandma who is in the hospital. I went because I needed to drive my mom (who couldn't find her way out of the metroplex if her life depended on it) and my sick mawmaw back home. The trip was a little unexpected, but it was cool to spend some time with the family. We got into Cisco a little later than planned, so I decided to stay the night and ride back home with my mom that Sunday morning. Anyways that's not really the point to this blog, but in true Mr. Henson form, I'll just say, "I told you all that, to tell you this."

I have an amazingly cool pawpaw and what's even cooler is how much of a Godly man he is. We were sitting around the table, just talking about life and everything in between, when he handed me a newspaper and started telling me about this article about some students that were taking Greek and Hebrew classes to better understand the Bible. He knew that I was also taking Greek and was fascinated about what different passages looked like in the original text. You have to know this about my pawpaw. He grew up in a family of 6 kids, down in the swamps of Louisiana, DIRT POOR, not only did he not finish high school, he never even finished 8th grade, he has worked 99% of his life in the oil field or some occupation that deals with it, the other 1% of his life was either spent on a river fishing or on a ship in the navy, his entire family is Pentecostal (or LDP), he has lost not one, but two of his three kids, and he still gets up everyday at age 69 to go to work because he doesn't want my mawmaw to every HAVE to work to support them. As we sat around that table, he told me story after story of how he would be reading his bible and pondering it's meaning, when God would speak to him and not only help him understand it, but also show him where he could apply it in his life. He told me a few stories about how he would share God's love with some of the field hands he works with everyday.

For much of my life I really didn't know much of his story. I didn't know that for much of his life he shunned everything that had to do with God because of his families background. I didn't know that one day he felt like he should take his family to this small country church because he didn't know where else to turn.

God has blessed me with an amazing family. God has blessed me with an amazing Grandfather who LOVES God and people. I only pray that one day, I will be half of the man that he is, because if that happens the Kingdom will look different.

If you say Go, I will go....maybe

2008-10-23T19:30:00.000-07:00

So I've been doing some research for a couple of my classes and thought I would share some stuff I found.

Ever had that tugging on your heart for the nations. Ever thought that you would love to go serve lost people overseas or even hear in the states, but have no idea where to even begin. Ever thought that only if you didn't have to give up a few months of your schedule. Ever thought that mission work would be interesting, but it doesn't really fit in with your job or skill set. Well the people at RightNow may have an answer for you. Here you can freely use their program to find the right spot for you. You can select the country or area you want to serve in, the organization that you want to go with, the time frame that you have to serve, and also the different skill set that you have such as business, church planting, or even a passion for sports. RightNow then takes this information and instantly gives you agencies that need help from someone like you.
Here is a few facts on unreached people groups I found here. There are approximetly 16,451 people groups in our world. Of those groups, 39% (6,412) consider themselves Christian, whereas 6,850 are considered to be unreached. And for me this is one of the most shocking stats: Of the 236 countries in the world, 169 (72%) are considered to be Christian, yet there are almost 7,ooo people groups who are unreached.

Just a few things that I've been looking at the past few days and thought it might make you think. Pray for the nations.

Weekend Review...a week late!

2008-10-03T20:07:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to be slightly more regular with my blogging, but it's been a crazy week and I haven't had time to update on the past weekend. So here we go:

Went to work Friday afternoon, which is usually crazy at the bank, and then grabbed some food and prepared to make the long drive to Denton. It always seems like a really long time in the car, even if your an experienced veteran like myself.
Got up on Saturday morning (freaking early) and got to go serve with some of my friends as Overflow ministries join up with the city of Denton in an effort to clean up some of the local waterways, which means we picked up trash out of a creek. Needless to say, it was amazing to see what God is doing with that ministry. There are some amazing people involved, who really understand what it means to serve a God bigger than any of them could imagine. I love being able to go back and see what God is doing and being able to serve right alongside these people is awesome.
Saturday afternoon was spent lounging around, helping Kaylen do some dishes, and most importantly watching The Horns absolutely dominate Arkansas. I love watching college football. It can make any day even better.
Saturday Night was spent celebrating a birthday of a very Godly guy and close friend. A group of us traveled to Ft. Worth to enjoy some great Posados Mexican Restaurant. Can't beat Mexican food!!
Sunday morning, Kaylen and I joined a couple friends and went to Fellowship Church. I'll be honest, this could be a blog by itself, so I'll keep it brief by saying, "I won't be back."
Sunday afternoon I spent doing laundry and doing a little more lounging around. It was good to spend some time with Kaylen. I really miss her so every chance we get to just hang out, we usually take it.
Sunday night I stayed around so I could attend the Sunday night service at FBCD, Overflow: The Gathering. I really enjoyed being back and hearing from Scott. He is a great communicator of the Word and I really believe God is using him in big ways there in Denton. Worship was amazing as usual. Kaleb and The Starks did a great job of leading the group into worship and are defiantly a group of guys who use their musical talents for the glory of God.
Leaving was really hard. I'll admit there were a few teary eyes, and a few hugs/sandwiches given. I really miss those guys. I miss doing life with such a Godly group of men and women.
I then may the drive back, getting back about 1 AM, which made for a long Monday.

That about wraps up my trip this past weekend. Be praying for Overflow ministries and the people that are involved in them. Pray that God would use them to reach not only the campuses of UNT and TWU, but the city of Denton as well.

Worship

2008-09-22T18:59:00.001-07:00

Brownwood, TX

2008-09-18T21:08:00.000-07:00

"....Let me just tell ya' that I am ecstatic about reading a blog of a life that takes place in Brownwood, TX. This is gonna be SUPER exciting...or maybe not." This is a quote from a comment that Nic left me a few weeks ago. This quote also sums up my past few weeks.

When I first really felt this is were God wanted me, I'll admit, as I have numerous times, that this isn't where I wanted to be. He didn't pick a place that I thought I fit in with, a place that was where I wanted it to be.
Summing up my HPU experience so far: Slightly mixed. I'm enjoying a few of my classes. They are causing my to view some things in a new light and are really stretching and pulling on my faith. My views are being challenged and I'm seeing Mission in a whole different way.
On the flip side of this I'm finding out that there are some super weird people that go to this school. They are all about being super Christian, where I'm not so much. I know it will get better, but it sucks not fitting in so much right now.
Also, I miss lost people. There are plenty of them at HPU, but I come into about 1% of them on a daily basis, if that. To be honest, I try to stay off campus as much as possible because some of the super christian on campus are harder to be around than the lost people elsewhere.
Guess I'm just letting off some steam. Things will get better I know. Just pray that God gets me through this. I'll try to be more regular, maybe something interesting will happen around here.

Update on Life

2008-08-20T19:32:00.000-07:00

Sorry about the blogging silence. I've been busy, and well when all you do is work, there is not really a ton to blog about. Here is a quick update on what has been up with me the past few days/weeks:

Got to go home and celebrate my dad's birthday. I have been blessed beyond measure with an awesome family, but specifically with a amazing Godly father. He is a great example of how a Godly man should lead his life. I hope to be the kind of dad he is when I have children.
Work has been pretty steady. I'm getting the hang of this teller thing. A few mess up here and there, but it's not bad. Get to work with some cool people and sit around when there is nothing to do. You can't beat that!
I got to hang out with my amazing girlfriend for a few days this past week/weekend. We really did absolutely nothing but sit around and watch the Olympics, but it was great to get to see her and spend time with her.
Tuesday I started classes. I'll admit, I wasn't exactly ready for summer to end, but I am ready to be done with school, so you have to start some time. It has defiantly been an adventure and I know that this is just the beginning of the journey. I'm excited to see what God is going to do in this time. I've never really been one to look forward to or enjoy school and I'm still not entirely enthralled about it, but it is becoming increasingly interesting and I know that what I am doing has a purpose, which helps immensely.

Father,

I thank you for the gifts that you have given me. For the family that I have been blessed to have, for the support that they give, and the love they have for me. I thank you for my relationship with Kaylen. She is an amazing Godly woman, one that I do not deserve to have in my life. I pray that you will strengthen her and give her a peace in our time apart, and that we will learn to enjoy the time that we do get to spend together. I thank you for the Godly men and women in my life that I am blessed to call friends. They have had such a HUGE impact on my life and I don't know where I would be without them. God, I pray that you use me. Be with me and show me what you want with me. Mold and shape me into the man you would have me to be. Shine through me. Allow me to be the vessel you use to reach the nations. I love you Father.

Are You Ready For Some Football?!?!

2008-08-07T20:11:00.000-07:00

So I just finished watching my first pre-season football game, and besides reminding me that I absolutely hate the pre-season, it got me pumped about the upcoming season. I really love football season. From Friday nights all the way to the Monday night game, it makes this time of year one of the best. Here some things I get excited about:

Watching the NFL. I'll admit I'm not a die-hard NFL fan, but I do love the Cowboys and am excited about what is going to happen with them this year.
Friday Night Lights. How can you live in this great state and not enjoy a Friday night watching a little high school ball? I can't wait to visit some stadium and watch some great games.
My Longhorns. Probably the team I am most passionate about. I love watching these guys play. I am usually on pins and needles while they are playing and have shed a few tears after some tough losses. I can't wait to see when that player who used to play in a town near Abilene (#12) screws up so they can put Chiles in. I can't wait to be glued to the TV watching every play.
Lastly, and this ties in with #3, I can't wait for College Football. I love watching football on Saturday. Watching players who don't get paid, don't have giant endorsement deals, but for the most part are playing the game for the love of playing it. They are going out and laying it on the line every Saturday because they love the game. I can't wait to see the mess the BCS creates this year and who will be in and out of the polls all season long.

The Past Few Weeks in Review

2008-08-06T19:33:00.000-07:00

So life has been slightly busy the past few days. Here is a quick update on life:

I got a job at TexasBank as a teller. It's been interesting to say the least. I've had to learn a ton of information in a short period, but I'm getting the hang of it.
I trying to get used to working again. The four months off were nice, but the balance of my bank account and credit card debt were not very pretty to look at, so I had to enter the workforce again.
Last weekend I pulled off a awesome surprise on Kaylen by coming to spend the weekend in Denton with her. She was pretty freaked out when I showed up, but really happy to see me.
We spent the weekend hanging out, moving some furniture into her new house, and doing some shopping. I had an awesome time and it was really hard to leave. Needless to say Jeff Johnson's "Glorious Day" was playing pretty loud as I left to remind me that what I was doing was what God wanted.
Kaylen and I are defiantly feeling the impact of a long distance relationship, even though it's only been about a month. We are learning to rely on God because this is hard. We both keep reminding each other that this is where God wants us and that He is going to do incredible things through us. Pray that we find strength in him to endure this.
School starts for me in about two weeks. I can honestly say for the first time in my life that I am excited for school to start. I know that God is going to use this experience in my life to teach me and use me in His Kingdom work.

Father,

Be with Kaylen and I as we go through this situation. Help us to rely on you. Help us to enjoy the time we do get to spend with each other. Teach us and use us for your glory. Your hand is evident in our lives. Bring people into our lives that need you, Father.

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

2008-07-24T15:28:00.000-07:00

I often find myself pondering what Heaven will be like when we get there and this always leads to a yearning to go Home. To have no troubles, pain, suffering, hardships. To be with our King for Eternity. Every time I find myself in this situation I am drawn back to Philippines where Paul writes: "To live is Christ to Die is gain." But last night as I was reading through, God brought to my mind the verses that follow 1:21. In these verses Paul talks about how he is torn between the two. He longs to leave this earth and be with his Heavenly Father, but realizes that at this present time it is more necessary to be on earth, serving.

This for me does two things:
1. It allows me to see myself on the same level as Paul. A great example I once heard is that if being in the will of God is like the ocean, we play along the beach, barely allowing ourself to get wet, while Paul is standing out in the middle allowing the waves to wash over him. But when I see that some of the same desires that I possess on a daily basis were also possessed by Paul, it lifts my spirits to push onward towards that goal.
2. Paul ends this section by saying that He feels that it is better for him to stay, and as it says in 26: "so that in me you may have ample cause to glory in Christ Jesus, because of my coming to you again." By staying here people will see Jesus in me, in us. Who knows who might see you today and see Jesus. You have a purpose. Allow others to see Jesus in you.

Father,
That is my prayer today. Move me aside. Shine through my life. Let everything I do be for you. Let me be mindful that the actions I take reflect upon you. I am nothing without you. My life is nothing without you. Lead people into your loving arms through my life Father.

"to be named at a later date"

2008-07-22T20:53:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the blog silence of recent days/weeks but I've been without Internet access for awhile, and I didn't really feel like driving all the way to my parents house to steal some. Not much of anything going on these days, but here is a short list to keep my one reader happy.

Spent a week on the lake hanging out with the family. We had a blast, caught absolutely no fish to speak of, learned my mom is a crazy jet ski driver, and caught a lot of sun.
I interviewed at TexasBank after I got back and hopefully have a job there come August, but nothing is for certain. I'm in need of some major funds seeing as I'm totally broke.
Seeing that I'm not working, I have a ton of free time and well it's been pretty boring lately. The apartment is set up and I don't really have much to do these days.
Got to spend part of a day with my wonderful and beautiful girlfriend last Sunday evening. We met up, had dinner and caught a showing of The Dark Night. I really am missing her and any chance I get to see her is really awesome. I look forward to the next time we get to see each other.
Sometime in all this I followed some of my close friends and jump on the Twitter bandwagon. I am now, as I was warned, addicted to it. You can see what I am up to here.

That's pretty much what I've been up to the last few weeks. I promise to update a little more frequently now that I can access the Internet more easily.

The Facts...Plain and Simple

2008-07-02T20:20:00.001-07:00

Well it's been a busy few days, so I'll try to catch the very few readers I have up on what's been going on.

Spent a few short days in Denton, hanging out with Kaylen, and packing up what was left of all my stuff.
Saturday evening my parents came up and we packed/cleaned/played rock band at my apartment.
Sunday morning, bright and early, we pick up and then proceeded to pack a very small UHaul with more stuff than anyone thought imaginably possible thanks to the expert packing skills my dad and I possess.
We headed down to Goldthwaite on Sunday night and spent Monday resting up for the unpacking of that tightly packed UHaul on Tuesday.
Tuesday morning around 7, we woke up, got breakfast, and headed off to start the process of finalizing my move to Brownwood.
Tuesday after we were unpacked and a few members of the party went back home, my mom and I stayed to unpack, arrange, and set-up all of my stuff.
After a few meals, a few trips to walmart and goodwill, Mom left and I went to bed after about a 17 hour day of moving.
Today I had lunch with my MawMaw and then headed to Goldthwaite to get ready for a day of painting tomorrow at Dad's office.
I'm spending the 4th with Kaylen/her family/most of my family and a few friends along the way. The next week will be spent on the lake as a last hoorah before I must find a job and end my summer a few weeks before planned. Hopefully this lake week will result in some good fish stories for later blogging.

Anyways, just a quick update for all the fans of the blog. Kaylen you can go back to missing me and selling your MaryKay stuff, check her out. Nic go ahead and make another Howard Payne/Brownwood joke and spend the next few moments laughing at my expense. Have a good one!

I've been down and I've been out

2008-06-26T16:48:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been completely worn out and you really haven't done anything. That's the way I've been feeling the last couple days. When I look back at what's been going on, I see a whole lot of nothing, wasted time where something productive could have been done, but wasn't. The strange part is that I'm really tired from doing all this nothing. I've been a little disheartened while reading my friend's blogs as they spend there time on the mission field serving and showing Jesus to the lost. I've been feeling useless. I wish I was there most times.

Father,
I'm not going to ask for patience, because I know that through you living in me I have all that I need, but I ask that you use my body for your service. I ask that through me, others would see you. That they would see Jesus. Help me to step out of my christian bubble I so often find myself in and show me how to love others as you do.

Pop the Bubble

2008-06-21T20:29:00.000-07:00

So recently I've really been struggling with the Church and how she is impacting this world. I've been reading a few books on it, a few of your blogs, and just in general observing for myself. I'm by no means an expert on the subject and most likely have contributed to the problem, but I really feel God calling me, tugging on my heart to make a change. I'm currently reading They Like Jesus, But Not the Church, by Dan Kimball. This excerpt from the book really opened my eyes.

Life in the Christian Bubble

" Then I began noticing what most of us talk about. Generally it's the latest Christian band or concert or what's happening at the church. As I recognized that we really only socialize with our Christian friends, I also recognized that overall, we are complacent about those outside the church. We aren't thinking about their eternal destiny. We aren't concerned about whether they're experiencing the abundant life Jesus offers. We are more concerned about whether there will be good snow on our church ski trip than about the spiritual status or our neighbors and the people we work with everyday. I became aware that I didn't hear much concern about those who don't know Jesus yet. We are all about making church better for ourselves and making our lives more comfortable in the Christian Bubble we have created."

"I didn't hear too much heartbreak for people outside the church among church leaders either. Church leaders are mainly dealing with complaints about last week's sermon or complaints that the music wasn't good enough, along with threats that people might go to another church where these things are better. When church leaders feel pressure from this kind of complaining, naturally the focus becomes having better programs, music, and activities to keep their people in their churches. Pastors face subtle pressure from Christian parents to have good youth programs to make sure that their kids stay away from the bad non-Christian kids and have the opportunity to meet other Christians. The whole thing feeds itself, isolating us from the outside world. It feels like we're building this social, spiritual, and consumeristic infrastructure, and Christians are only demanding more of it, building a stronger and thicker bubble around us, protecting us from the outside while we crate this very strange Christian subculture inside. But it had happened to me so slowly that I hadn't even noticed."

That us. The Church. The people that have been called to reach out and help the poor, hungry and beaten down, the least of these, but what have we done. We put ourselves in a bubble and keep to ourselves and in the process push others away. So it makes me question how many LOST people I have as friends and spend some time with during the week. The answer is pretty sad considering the number of lost people I encounter and have some sort of relationship. So my challenge for you and really for myself: Step out of the bubble.

Would You Pray for Me?

2008-06-08T22:09:00.000-07:00

Just a simple question it might seem, but as I look at my life (usually a hard, long look), I see that my prayer life SUCKS! Kaylen and I have just finished up our third week of doing a devotional together and this past week we were focusing in on Prayer. I have to say that this week has been very challenging for me. I found out that I'm not very disciplined when it comes to prayer and very frankly it's become a challenge for me. I try, but I feel myself moving into a state of checklist Christianity, which is almost the complete opposite of where I want to be with God. I'll be honest here: this is hard! Straight up hard for me! I want to be real with God, and he wants that from me, but I'm not always there.

Father,
Crack me! Break me! Consume me! Burn me! Mold and Shape me!
I am nothing.....completely and utterly nothing......without you. Help me to realize this God.
Show me Father, how to discipline myself. Lead me to that Deep, Intimate, Love relationship with you again. Make me long for you Lord. Make me hunger and thirst for you.
Amen.

Summer 08

2008-06-04T10:08:00.000-07:00

First off let me apologize for the recent blogging silence. I'm currently without Internet and am actually stealing Kaylen's Internet to write this blog. It's already proving to be a busy summer and I haven't really even started yet. Here's an update on what's been going on thus far and what's to come:

Spent the last few days of May in Goldthwaite with my family. We celebrated my mom and sister's birthdays and also had a chance to hang out as a family.
Attended the Memorial Day service in Killeen where a good friend, Rodney Thomas, was honored with his name and picture on the Wall of Fallen Heroes Wall. A very moving service to say the least.
Went to graduation and saw something that I never thought would happen. Taylor actually graduating high school.
Came back to Denton to an apartment with no Internet or Television and started the process of packing up all my crap. Hung out with some friends, but mostly got ready for the move.
During all of these happenings, I've been trying to sign up for some college classes and get things squared away with HPU. I still don't understand why colleges have to be so frustrating.
I'm headed down to Bwood this weekend to sign a lease on an apartment, hopefully all goes well and I have a place to stay this fall.
The next week will be spent in Austin with the family. My dad is attending a Principal's conference and we are going to take advantage of the situation and get away for a little while.
The third week of June will be spent at the Heart of Texas Baptist Entrapment. I'm working Pre-teen camp again this year. I have to say that I'm not too terribly excited about it this year, but hanging out with some good friends is always fun and it is always cool to see how God will move.
I'll be back in Denton the last week of June to finish up the move. It will be bittersweet. I'm ready to move on with this phase in life that God has called me to, but in the same breath it is hard to say good-bye to some really close friends. I'm not saying good-bye for good, but it will be different not seeing them as often as I am use to.
Among all this, I'm trying to squeeze in some summer school, so that I can raise my GPA a few points. I really don't know how this is going to work out, but it should be interesting to say the least.

Well that all I've got for now. I'll be keeping you up to date on the happenings this summer. Pray for me as the weeks go by.

Nothing like home...I guess

2008-05-24T20:57:00.000-07:00

It's been an interesting week. I got some good news on Thursday. Howard Payne finally got all my paper work, so I'm officially in the system now. I signed up for my summer classes and am already dreading them all. The family and I went out to lake Brownwood to celebrate some birthdays, which was a great excuse for me to go fishing. I came down to Goldthwaite Friday night and will be here until next Saturday. I'll be honest I'm not really looking forward to spending all week here, but it will give me a chance to catch up on some reading I've been wanting to do and see my family before I start all the stuff I'm doing this summer.

I'm really excited to see that some of my friends have entered the blogging world and can't wait to see what ideas/topics/random stuff comes from them as the days go by. You should check out their pages as well in my links column. Pray for them as they go through their daily struggles and that they would live their lives, not for themselves, but for Christ.

Kaylen and I have started doing a devotional together. It was recommended by some awesome friends. It's been an interesting experience thus far and I'm very excited to see what God has in store for us as we move down this journey together. Pray for us that we can learn and grow closer to God together.

The past couple of weeks have been stressful and the events of this last week really relieved some of that pressure but I know that there is more to come. I've really come to understand just how much I've been blessed to have the friends and family that I have. Pray that God continues to use me and that I allow myself to be used.

It's all part of the plan!!

2008-05-19T21:04:00.000-07:00

As I sit in an Arkansas hotel room and try to come up with a cool title for this blog (like the big time bloggers [not you nic]), I feel very anxious. I've been in the car for about 8 hours the last two days and have another 5 to go in the morning. I got to see an interesting part of my family (I keep reminding myself I'm in Arkansas), and attend the most unusual funeral service I've ever been to in my life. After lunch today, I made my daily call to Howard Payne to see if maybe, just maybe, today will be the day that they get all my transcripts and we can move forward in the process with them. I'm ready to be back in Denton, to rest in my own bed, to spend some time with Kaylen, to see my friends, to get out of the car, to go on vacation with my family, to go fishing, to find out what next year is going to look like. As I examine all of this spinning in my head, I realize that "I'm ready" and "I'm getting frustrated" are common themes in everything that is going on with me lately.

"He has made everything beautiful in his time" Ecc. 3:11

Father,
Help me to realize that things don't run on my schedule. Help me to see that you have made things beautiful in your time and not mine. Give me patience and understanding in this mess that I call a life. Amen.

It's a Family Tradition

2008-05-11T20:17:00.001-07:00

This has been a very eventful weekend. I have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to head down to Austin one of the first weekends in May and watch some great athletes run in the State Track Meet. I also enjoy this weekend because I get to spend it with my family. Here's an update on how the weekend went:

Drove the three hours from Denton (always fun) and got to G-Town on Thursday afternoon.

Friday around lunch we loaded up and made the trip to Austin, making stops along the way to do some shopping.

After checking-in at our hotel, Dad and I headed off to the stadium to watch the 3A and 4A portion of the meet.

We got in to the meet and headed to our favorite spot in front of the pole vault pits. We were then joined by some good friends and got to watch a good bunch of running.

We left later that night and along the road home, got some good Freebirds, and then got some good rest for our day at the meet on Saturday.

Saturday morning got off to an abrupt start with the fact that we had NO hot water in our room. The hotel hotwater heater was out and we were all forced to take COLD showers.

We were told that they were trying to fix the problem and decided to head off to the meet and hope they had it fixed by the time we got back.

We got some food, sunscreened up, and got set for what was to be one of the hottest days yet. We watched a good meet, sweated alot of sweat, and got a little burned by the sun, but for the most part had a really good time.

Then it got busy. We got back to the hotel looking for a shower and rest before dinner, but were met with a suprise. The hotel hadn't finished fixing the hot water and offered us a discount on the rooms. We then took our tired bodies and move our stuff to a new hotel.

After a much needed HOT shower, we go grab some ice cream from coldstone, and did a little more shopping.

Sunday we got up, packed up, and headed off to get some cajun food for lunch and had a little celebration for my mom. We then headed to Cove to see my uncle and granny. We got home Sunday evening just in time for a little rest before starting another week.

I've been going to this meet since I was in the 2nd grade, missing only three years. It's always been something that i've looked forward to doing. It started as a father-son thing and evolved into a family thing a few years later. Being able to spend that time with my dad is always something that I will treasure. It's not everyday that you get to spend time with a Dad like mine, doing something you love. My Dad is one of my biggest heroes and is an inspiration as a godly man. Spending time with him, watching a sport that we both love, is such a joy.

New Starts, Life, and a Funeral for me

2008-05-06T23:02:00.000-07:00

Well.....

I don't even really know where to start. I was sitting in my bed, doing a short devotional tonight/this morning, and I started thinking about where I am with God. There are so many times when I feel totally disconnected from him and even start to wonder if he really is there. I've come to this point numerous times in my spiritual journey and can never figure out how I get out of this feeling alone or why I keep coming back to this point. Then I am reminded of the numerous times I have been told that I should be journaling my experiences and that by doing this I can look back on where I have been and this will help me move forward. So I pull out a notebook and a pen and look at the blank page. "I can't write all this stuff going on in my head" I say to myself, "there is too much to write and I don't want to spend the time physically writing all this stuff down." So then I realize that I should type it on my laptop, and off of that thought comes one that I should blog. Just to make it clear, (even though it's pretty evident seeing my number of blogs) that I am completely horrible at this blog thing. I'm pretty sure nobody will read them. I look at people who blog almost everyday and wonder where they find the time, but then I look at myself and the stuff that I do everyday and see that I totally have the time to do this. So all that being said, I'm going to ATTEMPT to be more consistent with this. No promises are being made, but I really feel that this is going to help me (and maybe some of you) move along this spiritual journey.

So to catch everybody up on what's been going on in my life over the past year (yeah it's been that long), I moved out of the dorms in May of 2007 into my first apartment. YEAH for me! Anyways, I lived in Denton over the summer and found out just how much fun life can be and suck at the same time when you don't live with your parents. I spent the first part of the summer working some summer camps and just basically living it up with my friends. Then in July, I got a job working in Arlington/Lewisville, making sandwiches at a place called Firehouse Subs. Not too bad a job, or so it seemed at the time, and it was paying the bills. I was working with my roommate at the time and things were going pretty good. Then before I knew it the summer was gone and I was back in school. I had started to work my way into a few of my major classes and thought that things were going pretty much the way that I had planned for them to go. This is the point where God steps in and changes things up completely. I didn't find anything I was learning enjoyable and dreaded every class that pertained to my major. I was doing horrible in school and the stress of it was killing me. I didn't understand. This is what I wanted, this is what God wanted, but it wasn't and I knew it. I was to the point of running from God. I had made up my mind that I wanted to finish school, become a basketball coach in a small town, have a house out in the country, raise a few kids, and enjoy life with my wife. I would follow through with God's plan by doing all this. The only problem was that these plans that I had made, they didn't at all involve God. They were what I wanted for my life to become. They were what I had envisioned as being the perfect life.
I've felt God calling me to a life of missions for some time now. I never really understood quite what that meant but I knew that this was definitely what God wanted from me. I ran from it, literally as far as I could. I tried to get away, but the funny thing about God is that you can't get away. He is always there. Waiting on you to come back. Knowing all along that you will be back, and in the weakness that brings you back, he will make you strong.
I told my parents before Christmas of 2007 that I felt that God wanted me in the mission field. I told them that I was considering changing school and looking for a college that would help prepare me for my journey with God in the mission field. I move into an apartment by myself, signed a short lease that would allow me to move out after the Spring semester, signed up for a few basic courses, and started the process of looking for that perfect school that would be exactly where God wanted me. I had just one thing that I did not want to see happen. I DID NOT....IN ANY WAY......NOT EVEN CLOSE.....want to attend Howard Payne University. It's too close to home and i'll get made fun of by my close friends if I go there. So I started looking at other colleges. I look far and wide. In state, out of state, Baptist, non-denominational, bible college, mission college, I looked everywhere. I visited a few, talked to a few on the phone, spent a ton of time on the internet looking. People would help me, by telling me of different ones that they had heard of or knew something about. I would look, maybe even become interested in a place, and then something would go wrong. They wouldn't believe the way I did, the school cost too much, the program had way too many hours, I didn't see eye-to-eye with the staff at the school, they didn't have the programs I was looking for......the list could go on forever. So after getting tired of my parents asking, I visited Howard Payne. We took a tour (I'd seen it before), we talked with Financial aid (they told us nothing new), I got a T-Shirt(wooo), and then right before we left, I got to meet some of the professors, specifically the one that would be dealing with me. I made my decisions based on two things she said: 1. That we want to not only invest in your life through your education, but also through where you go after you leave us, and 2. That we aren't always about the theology of it all, but are about loving people the way Jesus loves them. I was sold. If anybody could some up the way I view ministry, it's with that. Loving people the way Jesus loves them. I didn't want to go to Howard Payne, I'm still not sure I do, but God wants me to. I don't want to leave all my Denton friends, Overflow ministries, my girlfriend that I love with all my heart, but God wants me to. It's been tough. I don't like it sometimes. It would be so much easier to just do it the way I want to do it, but that's not what it's about. It's about obediance to Christ. And so i've come to this conclusion: It's Not About Me.

Ponder that statement. Does you life look like mine did (and still does sometimes)? Do you make it about you? Or something bigger than you?

How _____ is our God!!!

2007-03-08T13:31:00.000-08:00

How _____ is our God, Sing with me How _____ is our God,and all will see How _____, How _____Is our God. I mean really, are we calling the God that created the universe, the skies, the very earth we stand upon, the air we breathe, and everything else, great. The hamburger I had for lunch was great, Kevin Durant is a great basketball player, but to put the God we worship into comparison with that by saying he is great seems to me that we are selling him short. It's like we put him in this box, and say here you are God, be great. Do what we want, help us when we need help, and just stay out of the rest of our lives, that would just be great. I guess it's just a frustrating thing that I have been thinking about lately, so I thought I would share it with you. Sorry it's has been so long since I've blogged, but since Nic threatened me, I figured I would start back up and try to be a little more consistent.

The Way We Worship

2006-10-16T12:44:00.000-07:00

Man this week has been really stressful. I have had a ton of homework, and a couple tests to study for. It sometimes seems like it can be too much at times. This Sunday, as I walked into our Sunday night Overflow service, I was just feeling tired from the stress of last week and trying to prepare myself for what I had to do this week. I didn't really talk to many people before hand and just kinda sat there wishing I had stayed in bed. But then as the band started to play, I decided to stand up and sing a little to maybe pick up my spirits. I sang along with most of the three or four songs, but really didn't put a whole lot of emphasis into it. Then Scott came up to give his message for the week and started it off by saying that he had been really busy this week and that God had really been laying something on his heart and he felt like God wanted him to say something to this group. He read the passage out of Isaiah, where Isaiah has a vision that he is in the presence of God and realizes that he is unclean. He talked about how most times when we come in the presence of God, we don't humble ourselves and see ourselves as unclean before the perfectness (if that's a word) that is God. I really felt like God was talking to me, because usually (and I guess, at times, most of the church does this) I just sing the songs I know or that I like but really it shouldn't be about the songs that we sing but who we are singing them to. So after Scott was done and the band began to play, I knelt down before God Almighty and humbled myself before him. After I did this, I had a new sense of passion. It didn't matter that I can't sing at all or that I didn't know two of the songs that we were singing, all that mattered was that I was truly worshiping the One true God. After that, yeah I knew I had a busy week ahead, but it was more bearable because my passion and desires weren't for me but for God.

Killing the Flesh

2006-10-12T13:48:00.000-07:00

It's crazy how sometimes we think we know everything, but in reality we are absolutely way off base. We go through are daily lives thinking that everything is perfectly normal and that we have it all figured out. We don't need help, we are capable of doing it all on are own. Man are we wrong. Do you ever question your salvation, especially when you have that one sin in your life that, no matter how hard you try to force it, no matter what you try to put in its place, it just will not go away. Do you ever think, "Hey maybe I don't really know what I think I know about Jesus?" All these thoughts have been going through my mind lately. I'm trying to figure out ways to raise five thousand dollars to go to Germany this summer. I'm just getting used to living on my own, away from my parents, in some strange town. I'm trying to keep up my grades, so that I can stay in college. I'm trying to make new friends and keep up with my old ones. I'm trying to live this christian life as best I know how to, even when I know that I am going to mess up. But then it hits me. As I am trying to sleep after another long day of pondering what I should do next. It really isn't even about me. It's about a God that loves me unconditionally. It's about a God that is so jealous for glory that he waits until the exact time we need him most, to come and whisper in our ear: "Be still and know that I am God." I don't always understand everything. I don't want to most of the time but I serve a King who is taking care of it all. That's what this past couple of weeks has been about for me. Yeah I still don't know how I am going to come up with five thousand dollars for this summer. Yeah I still have to get used to college life. Yeah it's going to be tough sometimes, but through it all we just have to have faith that God who became fully human and was still fully God, that came and die on a cross with my name on his heart, has everything under control.